5.14.23
Sometimes even the strongest of chains will break. When they do, we often look hard, trying to find the weak link, wondering if it can be repaired, asking ourselves if repaired, can it ever be as strong as it once was? Life is sometimes like that isn’t it?
Years and years and years ago, Darrell gave me a lovely gold heart with several diamonds glittering in it. Nothing terribly fancy, but to me it became a symbol of his deep love for me. Since the moment he placed it around my neck I wore it day and night until the fine chain it hung on wore out and came apart. A new, stronger chain was immediately bought and once again my precious heart was back around my neck. Soon, that chain too started to show signs of wear. The opening on the heart where the chain ran though was also starting to thin and showed signs of failing, making me afraid I would inadvertently lose my precious heart while outside working. So, the heart went in to have the opening reinforced. It felt odd to not have it hanging there around my neck.
Once again, it was not long before the second gold chain was showing signs of wear. This time, a much heavier more sturdily chain was bought, and the jeweler removed the clasp, making my precious heart secured in a continuous loop of gold. The length of the chain was such that it could easily slip over my head for those rare moments when I had to remove it for surgeries or x-rays. It always resided in Darrell’s shirt pocket until he could slip it back over my head when whatever procedure had caused its removal was over. My precious heart would once again be lying over my own heart.
I never wore this little heart, dangling on its gold chain, outside my clothing as it was to me, not a piece of jewelry but something so much more. It was a special token, a sign of the deep love shared between my dearest and I. It was precious.
A couple of nights ago, I was restless. I had much on my mind and just could not settle to sleep. Turning over I felt something slip from my neck. Thinking it was a mere bug, I reached up and realized my gold chain, that seemingly forever sturdy chain, had broken. Anxiously I felt around until my fingers closed over my precious heart. Tears came to my eyes. What had caused this to happen? What weak link finally failed? My mind immediately wondered if this was some sort of omen, some harbinger of change, for yes, Darrell and I had been talking of making some changes in our lives.
Yesterday was a rough day. It may seem silly to be so worried about the breaking of a simple gold necklace chain, but I found my hand unconsciously straying to my neck, searching for the heart that was no longer there. It now lays atop its broken chain in front of a picture of me and Darrell in the bedroom.
Darrell is going to find another gold chain, even sturdier than the last. Once again, we will have a jeweler forge it into a continuous loop, a loop that symbolizes our endless love for each other. Securely enclosed in that loop will be my little heart. The day will soon come when Darrell will once again slip the chain over my head and my little heart will lie once again next to my own heart… where it belongs. All will be well in life again.
