The day after the Fourth of July and I am inside the house making soap with the little window air conditioner going as it is currently 90 degrees outside… in the shade. It is not quite as hot as it was yesterday when I was down in the Monument City park tending to my little stall where I had soaps and lotions, bath salts, cheese and smoked sausages displayed for sale. I am always very pleasantly surprised when folks come by to purchase something from me and have to admit it makes the long day in the heat worth it to see folks smile as they sample some Summer sausage or Salami along with a tad of Gouda or Farmhouse Cheddar. Darrell cannot understand why I am so apprehensive before heading off to a market, he seems to know people will purchase what I have on display, but I always have that moment where I wonder if I will actually sell anything.
Despite what a lot of people think, there is a great deal of insecurities hidden under this skin of mine! The colly wobbles hit me every time I stand up in front of a group of folks to teach an EMT class, even if I have taught them before. Worry strikes me when I head out to meet a group of riders who have come to me for lessons on their horses, or those folks who have requested my services to help them with a fractious horse, a desire to jump higher, go faster or just regain some confidence that has temporarily left them. Of course once I start to teach, no matter the discipline, all my colly wobbles seem to disappear, but before I start they are there. Maybe this is something that will always be part of me and in a way is a good thing as in turn it really makes me appreciate all I have.
The Fourth of July is a very special day for Americans and rightly so. Now this may sound rather strange coming from a person born in the country from which America gained its independence, but when I hear that “Star Spangled Banner” being proudly sung and watch the Stars and Stripes sway in the breeze, it does make me proud to be a part of this country and to be an American citizen. As I was in the city park yesterday, the entire area festooned with flags and bunting to celebrate the Fourth of July, a friend and neighbor lady of ours sang the National Anthem with such power and grace that as we all stood in silence facing the flag it brought goose pimples to the back of my neck and once again I felt so very privileged to be living in this country. Now I shall always be English through and through and will always love my homeland but feel so fortunate to nowadays have my home on this side of “The Pond”.
Back in 1996 I decided to make America my permanent home. There were no citizenship classes close to where we lived so I duly sent off for the “study at home” course which was a pre-requisite to taking the citizenship exam. When the books arrived, which I had of course to pay for, I began to wonder if I was up to taking a citizenship exam! One had to study all three books as it was made clear that the “exam” would be based on questions from these books. There was a book detailing the judicial and political system of America, one was the condensed history of the United States from back in the late 1700’s through to present day, another the roles and responsibilities of being an American citizen. The history book was daunting to say the least! As I read through the chapters, questions followed that a prospective citizen was expected to know. I studied and studied, had Darrell test me on my knowledge, learning the fundamental differences between the Articles of Confederation and the Constitution, the disparities between the newly formed states and territories, trade… you name it! It was daunting to say the least especially when I asked some of my American friends the questions and they just gave me a very blank look!
So it was with a very nervous heart that saw Darrell and I heading to Portland for my examination. We sat in a huge room with almost all the posters in Spanish… yikes… was I supposed to have learned Spanish? With great apprehension I headed through the door when my name was called convinced I would surely fail this exam and be forever a green card holding legal alien. The lady who was my examiner really did try to make me feel at ease as I am sure she could tell I was terribly nervous. I shall never forget those questions she asked me, I was mentally running through obscure facts when she took me by surprise by asking who were the main contenders running for President in the upcoming election (1996 was the year a Presidential election was taking place). I was quite surprised at such an easy question and was able to answer promptly and correctly. The next question was “What are the two main political parties in the United States?” followed by “Who was the current Governor of Oregon?” The last one totally took the wind out of my sails… with a smile she asked me; “and finally what do we celebrate on the Fourth of July?” … really? Was she serious? That was it? After all my frantic studying and worrying I had those four easy questions? I asked her after the final one if that was it and she replied “Yes, that is it.” Oh my gosh was I relieved… disappointed because I had studies so hard… but relieved. So on January 31st 1997 I was sworn in along with a hall full of other people and became an United States Citizen.
Yes, as I watch our flag flying on the mound as you approach our barn it reminds me I shall always be English but am pretty proud to be an American on this Fourth of July holiday weekend! God Bless You America!